Ascendancy Forge

Lantfeust's Journal 7ish

Hi journal!

So we’re still in that cave. I’m kind of bored of caves now. I mean, they just go on forever and ever and ever and I’m sick of it! And we keep getting attacked by gooey things. Which are now dropping from the ceiling. You know where things don’t drop from the ceiling? OUTSIDE!

So I killed some spore thing that became a cloud and then disapeared. I don’t even care anymore what the hell it was doing. Ramis and Aerokii just keep pointing me at things and I just kill them. Then there was a BAT!!!!! But not really. It was less dangerous. I doubt it even carries children away in the dead of the night to be sacrificed to some fell god. It probably just eats them. Where the fun in that?

I nearly killed Ramis. He was so angry he didn’t even give me back my arrow. I mean, sure, he nearly bled out, but still, Elven common courtesy dictates the return of all weapons and weapon-like objects to their owner at the end of battle. It was a dueling law set for by King Spring the Bounciful. Or something like that. He was tired of attaching ropes to the end of al his arrows and knives when fighting the enemy so he put forth the Law of Hey! Give that back dammit!. All races are subjected to it, cause he said so. But the goblins never give our stuf back so they keep having to be punished. The only punishment for breaking the law is, of course, death.

So then we all rested because everyone else was all bloody and tired, except me, but no one ever cares to ask me what I think. We found some dead dwarf and his weapons and everyone crawled all over his bones in order to grab the stuff they liked best. Watching them scavenge his corpse was disgusting. I just sat there, eating the jerkey I found and shaking my head.

After that I choked a bit. Everyone was really helpful trying to save me after the first couple minutes me not being able to breathe. Though they don’t seem to be really good doctors. The new girl actually poked Taz in the eye instead of helping me. Anyway, it turns out I ate a symbol and it’s caught in my throat now. So now, when I open my mouth too wide, acid shoots out of my mouth!!! Ramis said I should keep my motuh shut from now on unless I’m really really certain I want to use my new trick. I did that for as long as I could, but during my night watch I realized I wouldn’t be able to yell to alert anyone, so I went to go ask Ramis if I could talk during watch. But I accidently spit acid on him while he slept as I woke him and he got real mad and woke up everyone else, which was really rude of him because they were sleeping and had had a hard day and he should apoligize to them but when I suggested it he got madder and told me to go to sleep because I wasn’t doing a good job, despite the fact that no one attacked anyone while I was on watch which tells me I did a great job.

Everyone’s ready to go now Journal so I have to go too. I’m sorry I melted some of this page away but I got the hiccups. Ramis says I’m even mroe dangerous with my new pet and that I should stay as far away from him as possible, meaning he trusts me to fight off everyone he can’t see now!!! It’s a great honour!

P.S. Everything tastes like strawberries now. It’s kind of great.



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